Anniversary megapost

Three years ago, my wife made the biggest mistake best decision of her life and said "I do."  Because we decided we could be as cheesy as we wanted on our wedding day, we gave out an "our songs" mixtape (mixtape always sounds better than mix-cd) as a favor.  I guess you could say I put together an unofficial blog post to elaborate on our choices.  Here, in all its sappy glory, is what I worte (I'm linking to any decent videos I found instead of bogging down the post with a whole bunch of embedding):

In the years we’ve been together, music has always had a special place in our relationship. Whether its songs we hear in the background of movies, artists we’ve discovered, or the concerts we’ve enjoyed together and with friends, there are certain moments and feelings that are tied to the music we’ve experienced. The songs that we’ve included on our CD favors are the ones that mean the most to us. Below are some explanations of what these songs mean to us, or at least to me. This may be a bit over the top on the sentimental scale, but I should be able to get away with that today.




Track #1 - The Beach Boys – God Only Knows


Brandie and I couldn’t figure out what “our song” was until we thought back to the first time we went out together. The first time we ever went out together wasn’t on a date, it was for a class project. We had to sit through one of the most boring meetings I’ve ever been to and we ended up cutting out early. I think we both still got A’s on the assignment, though. After the meeting, I convinced Brandie to join me for a movie (it didn’t take much convincing). We saw “Love Actually” and it soon became “our movie”. God Only Knows punctuates that movie in a great scene at the end. It’s the song that sums up “our movie,” so it has become “our song.”



Track #2 - Ben Folds – The Luckiest


This is the song Brandie walked down the aisle to. It is a beautiful song about love and being meant for each other. This is one of those times where the song says it better than I could. There is actually a line toward the end of the song that goes “I love you more than I have ever found a way to say to you.” It may be overly sentimental and a bit clichéd, but I think I can get away with that today.



Track #3 - The Clarks – I’m the Only


The first time Brandie and I went on an official date, she took me out to dinner. I proceeded to call her my sugar mama every chance I got. After dinner, we were hanging out with one of my roommates at my apartment and I decided I’d try to show off by playing some guitar. “I’m the Only” is the first song I ever played for Brandie. It must have worked.



Track #4 - Old 97s – Question


One day, we were in my favorite music store (City Lights Records) and decided to get an Old 97s album. Brandie insisted we get the one with “Question” on it. I wasn’t familiar with the song, but soon found out how great it is. “Question” is a song about a man proposing to a woman who isn’t quite expecting it. When I decided it was time to pop the question, I had originally planned on playing this song in front of a bunch of people and making a big production out of it. I ended up not having the patience for a big production of a proposal and asked her as soon as I got the ring home from the jewelry store. Just like the song, she wasn’t expecting it (but she was hoping for it) and she started to cry.


Track #5 - Frou Frou – Let Go


We first heard “Let Go” at the end of the movie “Garden State.” “Let Go” is a song about taking risks, letting go, and appreciating that great things can come from screwing up. This marriage thing is a big step. Putting so much trust in someone can be risky, but we know that even through hard times, we’ll come out on top.




Track #6 - Bright Eyes – First Day of My Life


This is one of my favorite love songs ever written and it is by a guy who is better known for sad songs about loss and pain. There is one specific part of the song – “I don’t know where I am, I don’t know where I’ve been, but I know where I want to go” – that I think is a great example of the sense of comfort and security you get when you’re with the one you love.




Track #7 - Ray LaMontagne – Trouble


Brandie and I found our way to Ray LaMontagne’s music through the TV show “Austin City Limits.” Ray came on after we watched Ben Folds and we decided to listen to this shy guy who looked like he was just pulled in off the street. Our jaws dropped when he started playing and we bought his debut album as soon as we could. This song in particular always sticks out for us. It’s a simple song of redemption through love, when a man is “saved by a woman.” I can’t say that Brandie pulled me out of a gutter or anything, but I know I feel better around her than elsewhere.




Track #8 - Iron & Wine – Such Great Heights


Iron & Wine’s cover of the Postal Service’s “Such Great Heights” comes from the Garden State soundtrack. This is another song that is exceedingly sappy, but we love it anyway. Its quiet, its sweet, its everything you’d want in a song that reminds you of the one you love. While Brandie was studying in England, she listened to the original version of this song quite often. It reminded her of me and of home. Now, every time we listen to either version, she thinks back to her time abroad.



Track #9 - Cary Brothers – Blue Eyes


Another song from the Garden State soundtrack (if you didn’t guess, we really like that album). Brown Eyed Girl doesn’t work for us, so we needed a replacement. Most of the lyrics in the song - “I just want to sing a song with you. I just want to be the one that’s true” – are pretty simple statements of love and affection, but simple is good enough for me.



Track #10 - Duncan Sheik – For You


This song is included largely because I pushed for it. I had known the song before I ever met Brandie, but it has taken on a new significance for me lately. It’s a song that makes me think about wanting to – how did they say it in “As Good as It Gets?” – be a better man and wanting to build a great marriage.



Track #11 - matt pond PA – Lily Two


We got into matt pond PA thanks to Greg at City Lights here in State College. We’ve seen a couple of great matt pond PA shows in State College and couldn’t leave one of our favorite bands off of this list. Lily Two a song about being happy with who you are and where you are. Strangely enough, Brandie is even happy with who I am.



Track #12 - Beth Orton – Sweetest Decline


This song indirectly holds a special place for us. There is a book Brandie and I both read called “A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius.” “A Heartbreaking Work…” is a fantastic book that had a great effect on me in college, and I think, to a lesser extent, Brandie. Anyway, the author (Dave Eggers) likes to listen to songs repeatedly while he writes. He may be exaggerating, but he once said that he listened to “Sweetest Decline” on repeat for six days while he wrote this particular book. Brandie especially likes one line in the song: “You can’t pin this butterfly down.”



Track #13 - Jack Johnson – Banana Pancakes


I listened to a lot of Jack Johnson during the summer Brandie was in England and think about how great it would be when she got back and we could kick back and relax together. With how hectic life has been lately, we should take the advice in this song – “…maybe we can sleep in / I’ll make you banana pancakes / pretend like it’s the weekend…” – and forget about work for a day or two.



Track #14 - Gomez – See the World


For a Valentines Day gift, Brandie got us tickets to see Gomez and Ben Kweller in Baltimore. She even took me out to dinner in little Italy before the show. It was a great night and we had a lot of fun at the show. This song is especially meaningful for us because after we hear it, we tend to start talking about all of the places we want to visit.




Track #15 - Josh Ritter – Bright Smile


Josh Ritter is one of my favorite songwriters, and Brandie’s too. This song always makes her think about me and, of course, it makes me happy to hear that. This past winter, Brandie and I saw Josh Ritter play a solo show in DC. It turned out to be one of the best concerts I’ve ever been to. After the show, Josh stuck around to talk with the fans and sign autographs. While we were talking to him, Brandie mentioned my desire to one day own a coffee shop. He seemed excited about it and even offered to play a show there whenever I get around to opening the place up. He signed a poster for me with a note wishing me good luck on my coffeehouse dream. Now, thanks to Brandie, I’m going to have to go through with opening a coffee shop some day. Otherwise, where is Josh Ritter going to play?


Track #16 - Dave Matthews Band – Dreamgirl


I couldn’t let this list happen without my favorite band being included. I could make hours and hours worth of CDs of DMB music that means something to me, but we had to choose one song. “Dreamgirl” is a song that puts a smile on our faces. It makes me think of Brandie and that’s about all a song has to do to make me smile these days.



Track #17 - Guster – Diane


There’s a few lines in “Diane” that repeat, “We’ll make it out together.” For me, that’s what this song is about…getting thorough the tough times and all of the speed bumps in one piece. Brandie and I will have our speed bumps along the way, but I know we’ll make it out together, just like the song says.



Track #18 - Norah Jones – The Nearness of You


Norah Jones’ take on “The Nearness of You” is a favorite of Brandie’s. We’ve been to a couple of Norah Jones shows together and had great times at each of them. I think its safe to bet that we’ll make a point of going the next time she comes to town. I can’t speak for Brandie on this one, but the reason I like “The Nearness of You” so much is the simplicity of it…the way it says, “it doesn’t matter what else is going on. As long as I have you, I’m happy.”



Track #19 - Looking Glass – Brandy (You’re a Fine Girl)


We couldn’t make this CD without including “Brandy” (even though they spelled it wrong). I think about 80% of my friends responded to my introduction – “This is Brandie” – with a line from this song – “She’s a fine girl. What a good wife she will be.” They were right. Now that we live in Annapolis, and since Brandy used to be a bartender, the song fits even better. Any time I hear this song, I get a good chuckle out of it.


Track #20 - Virginia Coalition – Likeness


I introduced Brandie to VaCo’s music and she liked it right away. We’ve had a great time seeing them live and their music accompanies us on most of our trips. “Likeness” is one of our favorite VaCo songs. Its not just a song about being in love. Its about staying in love through a long life together. We obviously hope this for ourselves. We want to be one of those couples who are still cute and sappy together long after they’ve turned old and gray.



Track #21 - Jamie Cullum – I Get a Kick Out of You


Jamie Cullum is a musician we’ve been meaning to see live for a long time. He’s a crazy young British guy who loves to play jazz and big band music. You may have noticed this song as our recessional song. We’re hoping the first song played after we were married shows the kind of fun and good times we expect to have as a married couple.

Stitches on the Radio

Since I'm pretty amped to see The Gaslight Anthem tonight in Baltimore, but busy trying to get enough stuff done at work so that I don't have to stay late, here's a short post and a couple of songs.  I love the lyircs in the first song, "Boxer," reminding me of one of the great reasons to listen to music: stitches on the radio.  A great song can put some light at the end of the darkest tunnel.  Isn't that enough reason to spend a handful of money to join hundreds of your closest friends perfect strangers in a heartfelt singalong?

The Gaslight Anthem - Boxer




The Gaslight Anthem (Brian Fallon solo) - The Diamond Church Street Choir

Down in the Valley, With Whiskey Rivers

...these are the places you will find me hiding
these are the places I will always go

I'll go ahead and say this weekend is the unofficial start to fall, as the NCAA and NFL football seasons kick into gear.  I think the musical landscape changes with the seasons.  I've written about it before, how different music just feels right with certain weather.  The Sound On The Sound's Doe Bay Sessions (like many things in the world of music, I found out about this through another blog) is really great and what I've seen/heard so far seems like a great segue from summer to fall.  Beautiful songs and harmonies in front of a picturesque wooded and watered backdrop with a small group of people letting it all wash over them.

Sound On The Sound's most recent Doe Bay Session features The Head and the Heart, who are joined on their second song, "Down in the Valley," by Drew Grow and the Pastors' Wives (the stars of the previous Doe Bay Session).  I'm having trouble thinking of a way to describe it other than, "It sounds like fall," so I'll just go ahead and get to the music.  You can decide for yourself.  As far as I'm concerned, The Head and the Heart have a top spot on my stuff to buy/concerts to see priority list.



The Doe Bay Sessions - The Head & The Heart from Sound on the Sound on Vimeo.

A Heart Full of Plans But Nowhere to Run

It is a lovely day here in Naptown.  I took the back way into work this morning, driving with the windows down.  That's really the only way to soak in a great morning, right?  Anyway, I got hit with a great trifecta coming through the car speakers that I feel like sharing:

Loney, Dear - "I Am John"

I remember Greg at City Lights telling me about the first time he heard Loney, Dear live and grinning ear to ear thinking about thumping his table along to the beat as "I Am John" built to its crescendo.  Good times in City Lights...man I miss that place.

Mike Doughty - "I Just Want The Girl In The Blue Dress To Keep On Dancing"

I got some great looks from the construction crew flagmen I drove by while I was rocking out to this in the car.  Maybe my morning coffee worked a little too well today.

Rogue Wave - "Like I Needed"

No strange looks from the folks walking by the Naval Academy baseball field while this was on.  Maybe I wasn't singing loud enough?

Seemingly Effortless

Short post.  Two videos.  I'll get my words per post average back down to earth...

I had some background music playing while working through some typically fun stuff at my office and I let Grizzly Bear's "Vecatimest" album play through.  The more I listen to Grizzly Bear, the more I'm amazed by how polished and effortless their music sounds.  There is so much effort that goes into creating such a tight and clean finished product that I think it gets lost in the end product and in the hands of lesser musicians/vocalists would be a total mess.  I'm going to quote a YouTube comment from the first video because I think it makes the point better than me: "Black Cab is the crucible for good musicians. The lack of space limits you with instruments, and cars are pretty much dead acoustically, which strips the vocalist of even the slightest amount of resonance. It's almost a challenge. 'Come and play your music in this car. We dare you to sound good.'"

Grizzly Bear - All We Ask


Grizzly Bear - Ready, Able


Another YouTube comment because its funny: "it's like me ears just got f*%ked by a rainbow. bravo"

I am assured that peace will come to me...

"…a peace that can, yes, surpass the speed, yes,
of my understanding and my need"

(A warning before you continue:  This is about to get long winded and meandering, but if you've been to Seabass Says before, you already know that long and meandering happen from time to time.  What can I say, brevity has never been a very strong trait for me.  I'm not really sure if any of this makes a ton of sense, but I felt compelled to write.)

Its amazing what a long easy drive with a great soundtrack can do for one’s mindset and general worldview. I’ve written about Josh Ritter recently, but I just can’t help myself. He’s my favorite songwriter and “So Runs the World Away” was sitting in my car, just waiting for a little road trip to stretch it’s musical muscles. After expressing a desire to get off of our butts more often and do some running, my wife and I were given a copy of “Born to Run” as a book on tape (CD, technically, but book on tape sounds better). We’d been listening to it on our trip to and from the Blue Ridge Mountains in Virginia to join in on a family vacation and we were finishing it up as we drove to Pittsburgh and Ohio for a wedding with a stopover to visit with family over the long Labor Day weekend.

While listening our way through “Born to Run” and hearing these inspiring and touching stories of people expressing passion, art, and joy through the simple act of putting one foot in front of another and pushing human endurance to the edge, my mind couldn’t help but wander toward big picture type thinking. Am I doing things the right way? Do my priorities need shifted? Is it really that simple? One foot in front of another and we can find peace and happiness? What is the best path to becoming a better person?

I’ll admit I’m a sap and I fall for the sentimental feelings surrounding weddings. I love that no matter how many questions someone may have swirling around in their head or how uncertain their destination in life is, one thing they are certain of when they say those two words is that they know exactly who they can rely on to help answer the questions and find the path. I always think of the song “First Day of My Life” by Bright Eyes and the line:

“I could go anywhere with you and probably be happy.”

The wedding we attended was for a longtime friend of mine and there was plenty of catching up to do with the assorted friends and family. Talk inevitably turned to jobs, family, and the future. A friend and I were reminiscing about our old high school and college days and wondering if we had done it all right. I expressed my regret for taking things too seriously through school and not really appreciating what I had until it was all over. We talked about finding the right balance in work and life (somewhere between doing too much and doing just enough to get by) and I was reminded of my favorite quote from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off:

“Life moves pretty fast. If you don’t stop and look around once in awhile, it’ll pass you by.”

So I spent the drive between Akron and Pittsburgh rolling those thoughts around in my head and taking a step back to make sure life wasn’t passing me by. Instead of picking back up where we left off with the book on tape, we let Mr. Ritter sing us along our way as my wife laid down in the passenger seat to see if she could nap off the last few effects of the previous night’s celebratory toasts. The road was wide open and I was able to coast along and let things knock around as my thoughts ebbed and flowed with Josh Ritter’s songs. I think I’m starting to understand why there are so many songs about the road out there.

Ritter’s take on travel and movement has made its way into many of his songs and he weaves it especially well through the “So Runs the World Away” album. It’s the kind of album that can break your heart, piece it back together, beat on it a little to see if the glue is holding, and finally send it soaring off with hope. Not a bad backdrop for a bit of musing.

I think it is human nature to question things. It exposes cracks and faults when things look better than they actually are. It reinforces when things are as good as they look. It can be daunting to question yourself and give an honest answer. I guess its like taking to heart the last line from Ritter’s gorgeous “Southern Pacifica”:

“Southern Pacific, take me to meet whatever is hunting for me”

See, many of my friends and I are at a big crossroads point in our lives. Our late 20s and early 30s typically bring marriage, kids, settling down and saying “this is where and when I build my life and my family and where I intend to leave my mark.” As it usually does when I start into these different lines of thinking about life, love, change, and happiness (or for that matter, when I start to type up a blog post), my thinking was just circling back on itself. Questions lead to more questions and the answers are unsatisfying. That’s the problem with this stage of life. We’re old enough to have put school and growing up behind us. We’re expected to handle responsibility and make decisions at our jobs. We know just enough to realize there is nothing but future and opportunities ahead of us and it scares us to death. We want to figure it all out, but really, no one has the capacity to wrap their head around it all. All we can do is put it together little bits at a time and hope nothing gets missed along the way.

During my thinking and listening, something got triggered during “Southern Pacifica.” All that talk of travel with wide plains slipping past brought me back to a trip I took through Europe about 14 or 15 years ago. I remember a moment in that trip, looking out a bus window at the French countryside with a girl I had a crush on asleep in the seat next to me, where I thought to myself something along the lines of, “This is peace. This is a feeling I need to find again.” Coming back to present day, I looked at my wife napping in the seat next to me as we drove through Ohio and thought about how much better this all is than that little moment in France.

My thoughts coalesced while the CD played through “Lark” which I thought was both fitting and funny. Josh Ritter has said that “Lark” isn’t much more than a stream of consciousness type song. A collection of a bunch of fragments that come together to form a song. To me, it is a song about uncertainty and knowing that it will all make sense. The seemingly chaotic and indescribable inevitably will make sense (“I am assured a peace will come to me”) and there is a perfect simplicity to be found throughout (“the golden ratio, the shell”) if you can figure out where to look.

So there it is. The conclusion is simpler than those swirling thoughts and questions. Maybe they can’t really be answered after all. Or if they can, it’ll be too late to do anything about it. Through the chaos and uncertainty, we have to cling to what we know is good in life and know that a peace will come. In my life, I can be sure that wherever this late 20s uncertainty might take me, it’ll take me there with my wife, my family, and my friends along for the ride.

I may be shoehorning things in to fit with the music, but isn’t art supposed to be interpreted by the audience and not just by the creator? The next song on “So Runs the World Away” is “Lantern,” a wrenching and uplifting song about the truest love:

“Light and guide me through, hold it high for me, I’ll do the same for you, hold it high for me.”

I remembered the priest talking during the wedding, talking about living life for another. I looked to my wife again reclined next to me in the car and didn’t care about the questions any more

"...a peace that can, yes, surpass the speed, yes, of my understanding and my need.”

This morning, I took some of the advice from my trip.  I woke up and took my dog for a jog around the neighborhood, through a bit of woods, and around a school.  One foot in front of the other, soaking in what I could of the quiet morning, forgetting about any uncertainty, and getting home in time to see my wife off before she left for work.  I sit here in my office and look at a mile long to do list and smile as it doesn't even dent my new sense of peace.

Thanks for sitting through that (or skipping over it for the music).  Here's what little I can offer as a reward:

Josh Ritter - "Lark"


Josh Ritter and Dawn Landes (his wife) - "Southern Pacifica"


Josh Ritter - "Lantern" (performed at the Avalon Theatre, not too far from me)


Josh Ritter and the Royal City Band - "Lantern" (just because I have such fond memories of seeing this in a sold out club with the full backing band)